I blew it.
I can’t recall what it was exactly that Judy did. But I vividly remember my sinful response-the outburst of anger, the hurt in her eyes, and my severe shame and remorse.
“How many times,” I asked the Lord, “will you forgive me for this? I feel like I’m never going to get this right. Here I am again, on my knees, begging you to give me another chance. Pleading with you to minimize the collateral damage of my sin. You must be sick of me, I know I am!”
Ever feel like that?
You fail, hurt people, and disappoint yourself, those you love, and the Lord Jesus. You tell Him you’re sorry, ask for His forgiveness, clean up your mess, and move on with life really thinking you’ll never do that again. And then, before the dust settles, you do it again!
There is a verse in 1 Kings that really helps me at times like this. King Solomon stood before the people of Israel on that great day when he dedicated the temple and said, “Lord God of Israel, there is no God in heaven above or on earth below like You, who keep your covenant and mercy with your servants who walk before you with their hearts” (1 Kings 8:23).
Don’t miss the description of the ones God sustains with His mercy. It’s not those who “walk before you and never mess up,” but those “who walk before you with their hearts.”
If God is looking for perfect people to use, I don’t have a chance. And neither do you!
Thankfully, He’s not looking for people who don’t make mistakes; He’s looking for men and women who give Him their heart! The standard isn’t perfection, it’s passion. Your deep remorse is one of the surest signs of your passionate heart.
The next time you blow it, don’t offer God a lot of promises of perfection that you can’t keep. Give Him your passionate heart that honestly hates to fail Him.
And then trust Him; He knows what to do with a heart that is wholly His.
“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him to be a liar, and His word is not in us” (1 John 1:9-10).